Password Fury

I’ve decided this new age of passwords only brings out the absolute worst in me.

If you are wondering why I’ve been a little silent on social media and that there’s been a bit of an absence on the blogging scene it’s for due reason.

A few days ago my laptop stopped behaving.  All that was happening was spinning wheels and so I decided to shut it down and restart it – only it wouldn’t restart.

The start of my Christmas cakes

Dried fruits and nuts soaking in brandy

After an hour of screaming at it with no response (typical), I took it to the Mac shop up the road.  They advised it would need a few days in ICU and if I liked, I could pay an urgent fee to get it back sooner.  ‘No’, I replied, ‘I’m not in the mood to pay any extra.’

So I walked home hoping they would give my fairly new laptop some urgent attention and meanwhile asked Carl whose name is actually Drew, (and while I’m all worked up I just thought I should come clean on that point – it’s just when I started blogging he didn’t want to be a part of it so I had to give him an alias.)

Fast forward some 700 posts later and he’s quite happy to be Mr Hotly Spiced.  He’d like to come out of the closet so his name is Drew Hotly Spiced.

Moving right along, Drew said he would come to the rescue and all would be solved because he would generously lend me his iPad.

The cake tin resting on sheets of brown paper and the tin covered in brown paper secured with kitchen string

The cake tin resting on sheets of brown paper and the tin covered in brown paper secured with kitchen string

His dodgy ipad.

His iPad has major issues and should be booked into the hospital along with the laptop.  It keeps freezing and so to get back to that point of pre-freeze means not only delays but also losses of all that two-finger typing I just did.

The other issue is that the iPad isn’t set up for me. It’s Drew’s Facebook, Drew’s Pinterest, Drew’s email and Drew’s twitter. So I’ve had to try and log in to my accounts from his faulty iPad.  Herein lies the need for a Valium sandwich.

I tried to log in to my email but it came up saying ‘password incorrect’ which I disagreed with because I write all my passwords into my ‘notes’ on my iPhone and so there should be no dispute.

I went through three different passwords and all were declined.  I was furious.  All I wanted was access to my emails.  I tried again.  I tried one more stored up password. The ‘machine’ got back to me saying,  ‘You have tried that password before.’

So I tried another one but the retort was that I’d used that password in the past and pre-used passwords could not be accepted.

I wasn’t happy and had wasted over 40 minutes.  So after the 5th ridulous rejection and another request for a creative password I tried  ‘fuckyou’.  I thought I’d have a good chance of remembering this password.

The machine replied, ‘Your password needs at least 8 characters.’  It’s like they’re trying to incite violence.

I replied, ‘fuckyousall’.  But then my Valium sandwich kicked in and I realised that wasn’t really appropriate especially if I ever needed my children to log in on my behalf.

The baked cake

The baked cake

So my drugs came up with something appropriately more mellow and I finally had access to my emails.

But then I called the Mac store to enquire as to when I might be able to collect my laptop.  It didn’t go well.  The first day nothing happened because they closed the store for in-house training.  The next day there was a message on their answering machine saying they were under-staffed and so please don’t stay on the line if you’re are just enquiring about the status of your repair.

So little progress has been made and I have no images or recipes to share with this post except for the fact that today I moved forward with my Christmas baking and made a cake – at least that went well.

I hope to be back to you all with my lap top soon.

Comments

  1. Oh dear oh dear oh dear. It all sounds disastrous. I hate that! Good luck Charlie.

  2. Still laughing about the passwords… And you just throw that kind of info at us like that; the Carl information I mean?? He is so etched into my brain as a Carl now, I don’t know if I will ever get used to him being a Drew. ;o)

  3. I’m speechless. All this time and he has been in my head as Carl. It may take me awhile to adjust!
    Hope your techy issues are quickly resolved.

  4. Carl is Drew? Or Drew is Carl? How did that just sneak in? That is just too funny. Unlike passwords and PC problems which aren’t funny at all. Hope it’s fixed soon x

  5. David Lovell says:

    Thank you for your encouraging blog – when my laptop self destructed as a result of over zealous Windex application – I eventually moved to a whiz-bang new French model that promised computerised nirvana – alas failing to mention that it would switch between French and English keyboards at will – would not recognise any passwords – would not accept old email addresses and in short is an instrument of evil . Feel your pain! X

  6. Computer issues can be do frustrating. I hope it comes back in working order! And I just cracked up that Carl is really Drew. Love it!!!

  7. But Carl looks like a Carl!! I can’t see him as Drew, and that was a bit sudden. Sorry about your day, I’ve been having weeks of those, thankfully not password related but frustrating nevertheless. My biggest password fury actually comes from WordPress believe it or not. Trying to install the WordPress app on a new phone or iPad, is exasperating. Not to rub it in and all, I just got the new iPad, ooooh, that thing is wonderful, powerful and fast 🙂 Hope you have a great rest of the week. Charlie ( that is your name, right?) 🙂

  8. Oh I know the feeling. It’s so frustrating. I often get my password rejected despite knowing it’s right!! I’m impressed that you’ve posted from an ipad, I’ve never managed that. GG

  9. Computer issues can be so frustrating, especially when you rely on it for work and communication. Up until 2 1/2 years ago, I had an in-house computer go-to guy in my son. But since he started college, I’m on my own, unless he answers my text or call when I have a question.

    Drew? How are we going to get used to that after Carl? So is your name really Charlie and how about your kids?

  10. Oh noes. We might have mobiles to remember all our phone numbers for us, but now we have to remember to so many different passwords it’s insane. If a Bex and a good lie down doesn’t help, surely chocolate will?

  11. Computer issues are SOOOOO frustrating! My husband installed an application called Password Box. It stores all our passwords in one area. He’s teaches computer security so I trust his judgement (in this case 😉 ). As bloggers we have so many darn accounts! So what name to you use, Carl or Drew? I never gave my husband a name on my blog until recently – lol

  12. The cake looks delicious! This is a hilarious story that I can relate to, lol. Thanks for sharing it. Glad you get into your emails. Best wishes! 😀

  13. Phooey on the Apple store! And I’m fed up with all the passwords and their stipulations. How the heck is one to remember??? My handy-dandy notebook is so full of all the variations…it’s insane. LOL at Mr. HS coming out of the closet 🙂 Bill still wants to remain anonymous…I’m just glad he doesn’t read my blog!

  14. Oh, Charlie, I felt every frustration in your post – like the car I just want my computer to work! Hope you see your computer today! Will keep my fingers crossed for you:)

  15. Oh my! I hate password problem!!! With hackers and everything we try to secure our information, but it drives me crazy with changing password time to time. I try to keep all my passwords same (I’m not that smart to juggle different passwords) so it’s a huge hassle when I update with all of my passwords. And the worst part is that I missed several accounts and forget to change the passwords. I don’t even remember which passwords to log in once they left out. I hope your laptop will recover soon and return to home quickly. Life ends when there is no wifi or laptop or iphone. Hang in there!

  16. Oh my god! Carl is Drew!!! Drew is Carl!!! That’s completely thrown me! I’m bad, I use the same password for everything. J tells me this is bad because someone could break into everything, but I can’t remember so many different ones.

  17. Drew? 🙂 I’m sorry about your password and computer issues, it’s very very frustrating. I have a house full of IT professionals and I was told I had to have a DIFFERENT password for everything. It’s ludicrous trying to keep them all in my head!

  18. Passwords are the devil … at least the cake looks good.

  19. Passwords can be maddening! I hope you get your laptop back soon. And, I wish I could smell that lovely cake while baking.

  20. Once upon a time all we had to do was remember our name to fill in the form when we went to the PO or Bank… passwords…. gah!

  21. OMG I think I wet my pants a little bit. You poor thing. I do use Last Pass to keep all my passwords but if I’m not on my computer, I have no idea. First world problems.

    Now you know we’re all going to put fuckyousall on something in your honor. I’m going to do it today. I might make it Fuckyoursall2014 because we’ll be required to have a capital letter and a number.

    I hope the time passes quickly and you’re back with us.

  22. ” Herein lies the need for a Valium sandwich.”

    I may need to borrow that phrase for my own use! I know this frustration all too well.

    I love the way you write. Your stories always have the feel of chatting amongst good friends. And even in frustrating situations, you still manage to add a bit of humour.

    Good luck with the computer!!

  23. Oh Charlie, I’m so sorry you’ve had all these problems with your laptop … nothing is more frustrating than when technology decides not to “play the game” but I have to say your post had me dying with laughter. As for hubby finally revealing his true identity, I’m not sure I’ll be able to get used to thinking of him as Drew … to me he will always be Carl. So glad your cake turned out … at least that was something positive after a couple of “hair-raising” days x

  24. Oh my, that is very frustrating. I use an app to hold my passwords but it’s now not compatible with iOs8.2 so I’m looking around for another one.
    At least the cake turned out great. I’m starting my Christmas baking on the weekend.

  25. Hmmm!! Altho’ I only use variations of three passwords I seem to be waiting forever almost every day for ‘lost password’ to be followed by ‘reset password’ to find out I cannot use some account for an hour or more till they update on their side! And however ‘clever’ I am in other languages in setting mine, half the time it still spits out ‘weak’ when I have typed it in . . . [and he did look like Carl 🙂 !!!]

  26. G’day! First of all, I FEEL your anger and computer pain…as when computers of any kind don’t work, it almost drives one insane!
    I am glad your hubby came out of the closet, for when we meet, would be awkward calling him Mr Hotly Spiced! lol
    I have a confession….I also had to laugh as I lost internet connect thanks to our beloved Telstra for 15 days last December…missed my 1st Blog Anniversary, Mum’s Birthday Tribute….trust me, you would NOT have wanted to be anywhere near me!!!
    Thankfully, due to a WONDERFUL manager in the Philippines, stayed with me every day and every night…the caring and customer service was a delight abet 15 days of no computers and no plan B as we live in a Blackspot area! Was more than compensated for it, but literally drove me insane!!! Cheers! Joanne Hope you are laughing now too!

  27. I can relate to your computer issues. I had major problem 2 weeks ago and was about to be without a computer until Thanksgiving (11/27) when I see my kids and they could take care of the problem for me. Fortunately my son-in-law came up with a solution and fixed it remotely. I too keep messing up my password and also forgetting it, very frustrating. I hope I can remember that “Carl” is “Drew”.

  28. Are you going to yell your password at me if I say I laughed? You poor thing I have had similar incidents. I wasted a whole day trying to make the internet work when I had my laptop connected to my big screen. Turned out that I needed to open my lap top a little. I nearly snapped the damn thing in half!

  29. I can sympathize with you, Charlie. About 2 months ago, after yet another “big box” store was hacked and our credit information stolen, I was instructed to again change all of my passwords. I gave up and installed password manager software for Mac. They’ve a free version that will wok on your Mac and a premium version to link up your other devices. It keeps track of all of my passwords and even assigns new ones when I need to make a change. It doesn’t always work perfectly but I never have to remember any passwords anymore, save one: the password to start the password manager. You don’t want to forget that one. 🙂
    (Nice to meet you, Drew.)

  30. So frustrating. It’s a shame we are all so tied to our devices. Isn’t it? But it’s just a fact of life. I hate it when anything goes wrong with my technology so I feel your pain.
    Carolyn

  31. Bugger! How incredibly frustrating Charlie. You would not want to see the password protected document Pete and I have which holds all our passwords and account details and anything else important not to lose. Hope your laptop is revived and ready soon!
    Hmm, Dave still looks like a Carl to me – will get used to Drew soon enough though.
    Have a wonderful day.
    🙂 Mandy xo

  32. Bahaaaa! Charlie I absolutely loved this post. From your frustrations which we can all relate to to the swear word password which we’ve all done but I like how your Australianised it with the “youse”. Brilliant!

  33. How frustrating! I share your pain. Days like these don’t you wish you were an IT expert – sometimes it feels like they are laughing at the rest of us. I have an account I use infrequently that always rejects my password although I have written it down and know it is right – then I try to open a new account using my email and they say I can’t because that email is already with an account and we go back and forth a few times until I find a chink in the armour and by then I am just relieved the password game is over!

  34. How frustrating and infuriating Charlie! My lap top is logged on with my apps and passwords, but my tablet won’t recognise all of them for some reason. I do all my day to day stuff on the tablet as I can use a ‘swipe’ keyboard instead of typing, that’s why I only visit some blogs sporadically as I can only check them from my laptop. I frequently forget passwords, and sometimes scribbled a new one down and tuck it into a safe place- always a mistake when I forget where that is too! Good luck with the fixing, and love to Drew 🙂 xox

  35. SO MUCH STRESS. After a virus outbreak last year, I changed all of my passwords to all be different and I can’t remember any of them, so I have to walk around with them attached to my hip all day long. It’s really not so fun.

  36. I went on a little hiatus from the blogging world and it seems I’ve missed a lot! Drew….hmm. That’s going to take some getting used to. Just when you think you’ve got a tight hold on your world, things are not as they seem! 😉 I hate computer issues and just the other day I was thinking I should go through every account and write down all my passwords…now I’m definitely going to do that. Luckily my son is a computer guru and was somehow born with the capability of fixing anything.

    At this age I’m finding I could use a Valium sandwich for a lot of things. And I found the “fuckyousall” password quite appropriate. LOL

  37. Oh Charlie – I am so sorry to hear about your password/computer/ipad issues – darn they are so frustrating – but your cake looks delicious! Reminds me of the Christmas cakes from back in Sri Lanka. Looking forward to this recipe – as soon as your technical issues are sorted out and you don’t have to deal with Carl – err Drew’s ipad…

  38. Glad to see Drew come out of the closet! Although Carl is a lovely alias. Anyway, I feel your password pain. I really need to start using one of those online password managers. Particularly since I can’t possibly remember the passwords I’m generating these days — way too complicated. Hope you get your computer back soon.

  39. Hi Charlie, I’m terrible with passwords, can never remember them or where the slip of paper is that I have written them on. Good luck with your repair!

  40. I feel stressed just hearing about it! I can only imagine how livid I would be in your shoes. Grrr.

  41. Oh dear. I shouldn’t laugh, but your post is making me giggle (the bit about Carl / Drew in particular!). I do relate though. I absolutely hate the need for long complicated passwords that seem to have different specific requirements on every different site that requires a password. It is too hard to keep up. And then when you forget, or are told it isn’t right, your life ends up missing a huge online component. I hope your computer is back up and running soon xo

  42. ROFL, Oh Charlie… you are hilarious 🙂 I have all my passwords written down, but sometimes when I change them I forget to change them in my notes!!! I hope everything is back to normal… I’m sorry that you had a not so good experience with the Mac store as I have a;ways found them amazing… maybe its time to treat yourself and buy a new laptop 🙂 you deserve it! Liz xx PS I have had the same password as well I just put a 2 after it 🙂 hehe!

  43. oh poor you! Touch wood that my 7 yr old macbook doesnt dieo n me, i will be so devastated.

  44. I read the paragraph about “Carl” coming out as Drew at least three times making sure I got it all straight. I’m laughing my head off at that. The part that has me laughing is that he has allowed you all this time to post photos of him…just not his name. LOL! I’m so sorry about the laptop and passwords debacle. Unfortunately I relate too well to the problem. I have recently had technological problems of my own. My biggest problem is that I need to free up some memory! You’ve made me think I’d better get to that. 🙂 (I hope Drew is feeling better with the truth about his identity!) LOL!

  45. Bahahaaha…. Oh dear, I feel ya with this one Charlie. A few weeks back someone tried to access my apple life/ID and I was locked out of my account because of a security risk. I spent half a day on the phone to support in the US trying to figure out how to gain access to my long standing account with apple. When I finally figured out the lady says to me….. You know how painful that was for me? I used to read your old blog and I knew the answers, but couldnt tell you. Gahhhhhhh!
    Fingers crossed everything is all up and running again now. Have a happy week ahead lovely lady. Cheers, Anna

  46. LOL!!! Like everyone else, I now have Drew etched into my brain as “Carl” and in my mind he now looks like a “Carl” when I see a picture of him…or WAS that him we’ve been seeing pictures of???? Yes, Drew will take a long time to get used to. I think it would be easier for him to adopt Carl as his “stage name.” 😀

  47. Oh Charlie this is so me. I have also used the password fuckyou because sometimes thats what you have to do. i also have some very creatyive names for my phone Siri. Shes just stupid!

  48. I might have been tempted to eat all the brandy soaked fruit after a day like you had. Now about Carl being Drew or is it that Drew used to be Carl…oh dear. 😀

  49. computers are wonderful when they are working and horrid when they are not. I’ve just contacted a social media coach and he offers ‘password management’ . He tells me it’s all quite simple once you have a system. I’m looking forward to this. Worth paying for peace of mind.

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