Earlier this week I walked in to my beautician’s shop hoping my favourite therapist, Rebecca, would be available to give me some long overdue maintenance. Unfortunately Rebecca was booked out but while I was making an appointment for another time I noticed a sign saying ‘70% off IPL treatments’.
I’ve been wondering about permanent hair removal for a few years now and have friends who swear by it to the point I think they’re addicted to it and have had just about every area treated sparing only the hair on their heads.
And it’s just so hard to resist a bargain.
So I booked in for today. I thought I’d tread cautiously though and not book in for any sensitive areas or large surface areas on my first visit. Just the underarms for today.
Well Rebecca assured me that this was a great idea as she’s had her underarms done and the results are fantastic and it would only take half a dozen visits and then no more gorilla underarms. I lay down on the bed and she gave me the glasses to wear over my eyes and she fired up the machine that was making some very worrying noises and then brought over the laser and pressed down on my underarm and zapped me.
Well give me the pain of childbirth any day.
I’ve had three children that I pushed out naturally and yes, not without screaming for drugs, it’s just when your doctor doesn’t turn up and your midwife leaves you on your own there’s no one to hear you yelling, ‘Drugs, give me the (insert your own adjective) drugs.’
But it’s not really appropriate to scream at the beauticians especially when the person in the next cubicle is trying to enjoy a soothing and relaxing massage.
So after the third or fourth zap I asked Rebecca if it was normal to feel like you’re being given an electric shock and that underneath the skin’s surface your arm is on fire. She said, ‘Oh, you’re coping really well. When I have mine done I scream and levitate off the bed.’
Now I would have preferred it if she had disclosed that little piece of information before firing me with the zapper. That way I would know that what I was experiencing was very normal instead of lying there thinking the machine was malfunctioning and I was being electrocuted.
And why have my friends neglected to mention the burning and the shocking? How is it they’ve been able to endure lengthy sessions covering broad masses of territory and having that zapper shoved into areas that are not only private but ultra sensitive. They’ve almost referred to it as a pleasant day out which is highly confusing.
Maybe I’m just a woos.
Sadly, one treatment is not enough. I’ve had to pay for another five. One every month for the next five months.
After that, hairy armpits had better not be back in fashion.
I would love to know if you’ve had laser hair removal and did you enjoy the experience.
Having felt the sting of the laser, here is a recipe for a sambal that has a lot of chilli in it so you would think it would deliver a punchy sting but it doesn’t. The sweetness of the palm sugar softens the sting of the chillies making this sambal pleasantly mild yet full of flavour. It’s delicious served with barbequed meats and we enjoyed this sambal with lamb cutlets that had been lightly dusted with ground cumin and coriander. The sambal is easy to make and takes no time at all.
Tomato and Lemongrass Sambal
Makes: 1 and half cups
Degree of Difficulty: 2/5
Cost: Half the price of buying a similar product and you get twice as much
- 2 large red chillies, de-seeded and chopped
- 2-4 small red chillies, chopped
- 2 cloves garlic
- 2 stalks of lemongrass, bottom half only and outer leaves removed, then finely chopped
- 2 tbspns vegetable oil
- 2 tbspns sweet soy sauce (ketcap manis or Indonesian soy sauce)
- 2 tbspns lime juice
- 1 tbspn dark palm sugar
- 4 ripe roma tomatoes, skins removed, de-seeded and chopped
- 1/4 cup water
In a mortar, combine the chillies, garlic and lemongrass. Pound to a paste.
Heat the oil to medium in a saucepan and add the paste, frying gently for a few minutes.
Add the remaining ingredients and cook, stirring well for about 5 minutes. Transfer to a bowl.
Keeps in the fridge for several weeks.
This recipe has been adapted from a recipe found in Essentially Thai.